Well this week has ended with a major fucking bang! I feel really shitty and in need of a good cry! In Month 5, heading into Month 6 of unemployment and all of a sudden it just feels like I'll never find another fucking job. I am so sick and tired of congratulating other people for the jobs that they've landed and trying to find really positive words to encourage those looking for a job.
I've run out of steam! I don't want to comb my hair, brush my teeth, shower or make witty conversation with people who call wanting to know why I'm not returning their phone calls. Well here's why fuckers - take it personal or don't take it personal I ain't talking to nobody these days. (Except Mags, Shoppers and G - who are really helping me from descending into sheer madness)
For some reason this month it's hitting me really hard and I just don't feel like doing anything other sitting on the couch in my jammies which is exactly how G found me earlier today. After listening to me wail about my miserable life, he sent me upstairs to put my game face on before we went across the street for a coffee and a good cry (Me not him).
So if you're reading this and about to call please note:
- I'm not meeting anyone for lunch, coffee, dinner (certain exceptions apply - if you're wondering if you are the exception then guess what you're probably not)
- I'm not talking to anyone other than a prospective employer right now (I've heard the pity in your voice and listened to your condescending remarks about why I'm not employed and all I gotta say is Karma is a mother fucker, you'll get yours bitch!)
- I am not interested in doing your marketing work for free to keep my skills sharp (I have an hourly rate and I actually have clients so if you think it's too high - FUCK YOU!)
- I'm not calling around to find a painter for you for since you think I have lots of free time on my hands
- I am not going to pull the dandelions out of your front garden for $40
- I am not interested in joining your Ponzi scheme
- I'm not going to run by your house to feed your dog, cat, goldfish or water your plants while you are at a work event
- I'm really angry and don't have any positive energy for anyone. Why don't you try pumping me up for a change?
- As well meaning as your suggestion was, I will not submit my application to be a school bus driver or work in the school cafeteria.
- If you are in any way, shape or form related to or resemble the spineless asshole that fired me (because he has no balls and is fucking his boss) I will run you over with my car.
Well I feel so much better now that I've said my piece, how about you?
6 comments:
I have a good shoulder and don't mind the tears. You just do what you have to and I'll be there for ya in whatever form you want, Ro. No pity. Just here.
Thanks Scribe,
I know that you're here as well as a few others but I got my ass chewed out yesterday by a "supposed friend" who was really pissed off that I hadn't called to hear about what was happening in her life, her new man, her new job, cause she wanted some career advice.
She went on to tell me that I was incredibly selfish and she just couldn't understand why I couldn't just hurry up and get a job already. She then went on to insinuate that something must be wrong with me and my skills.
I'm majorly PMSing so that convo didn't really help - I was feeling a little fragile. But after a good boo hoo and some words of wisdom from Mr C. (Fuck her and the horse she rode in on !) I feel a bit better :)
We should definitely meet up for coffee soon. I called you back that night but it went to your vmail. How did your dr's appt go?
You are fantastic! You are awesome! You are my hero! (I think I choked on my vomit on the last one.... ;))
In all seriousness,remember what you've taught me: focus on yourself foxy, not on the other leaches around you! Don't let their insecurities, negativity, fakeness or issues interfere with your positive energy. (side note: do you think this is a sign that you need to do some "clean up"? I digress). You are a strong, powerful woman who has a lot of talent to offer to the RIGHT employer. Take a look again at your game plan....did you miss a step? Is there some way you can step outside and look at things differently? Re-write it out again.
Hang in there! I sense really big things for you soon. Patience, grasshoper, patience!
Your friend and hero,
Mags
P.S.....it's 2 pm and I'm still wearing my jammies, haven't combed my hair, showered or even brushed my teeth..I'm a hot mess too!..glad to know I'm in good company!!!!!
Well that's no friend at all. I would say that that person is something that starts with 'c' and rhymes with 'runt'. But I'm sure you have figured that out...we should all get together soon for some laughs, I know I could use one too. Doristasia's next adventure will include a 1950's bikini and the vans. Now I just have to find the damn bikini...
I concur with Mr. C, Rhonda. Good friendships are not like that. Even if you haven't heard from the person in a while, good friends pick up where they left off and offer you support and not question why you were not there for them. Friendship goes both ways.
And as for Mags' comment, I concur wholeheartedly. You are the most grounded person I know and this is just a blip. You're allowed to have them. You're allowed to have rants and bad days. You wouldn't be human without them. The main thing is that you look at what doesn't work and try something else that will. I myself think you're on the right track and you will soon find that great employer with a great job and the right fit for you. It's all about the environment in which you want to work. Hang in there! You're worth it!
We will definitely get together for coffee! This week, next? You let me know. I'm open. And I'll tell you all about my doctor's appointment and we can slag that skanky bitch who insinuated such drive!
Love you to no end, Rho-Ho!
Thank you ladies so much. Thankfully this week is off to a much better start.
Stace name the time and the place and I'll be there.
Scribe - Absolutely coffee this week sounds great. What about Wednesday or Thursday. I'll reach out and give you a call on Wednesday.
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